I'm Only Human

About a week ago, I heard a new song by singer Christina Perri titled "Human." Aside from the fact that this chick has a powerhouse voice, it was the lyrics to the song that hit so close to home. People aren't meant to be indestructible, we are all fragile in our own ways and the world seems to have a conniving way of knowing exactly what it takes to break us. And by the world, I mean Satan and the evil that manifests itself here. I don't mean to sound dark or anything, but it's the absolute truth. As Christina puts it in her song, "I'm only human, and I bleed when I fall down. I'm only human, and I crash and I break down." Now I'm going to be vulnerable for a moment - I'm the kind of person who feels like it's my job to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. I have believed for so long that it is in my job description to be the friend that is always there to listen and give back to others, and in most cases, do my best to help "fix" the issue. I don't like to look like I'm broken because I have found security in others believing that I have my life all put together. Well truth is, I don't. In a lot of ways, the life I've known for so long is crumbling and there are many mornings that I wake up with all the pieces in my arms and try to figure out how I'm going to put them all back together. But I'm only human, I can't piece together brokenness. Thankfully, I have a Savior who comes to rescue me. EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING. He reminds me that I don't have to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, I don't have to listen to the lies that it's my job to be strong and stand tall every day. Jesus says in Matthew 11:28-30. "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." A yoke is a heavy wooden harness placed on the back of an ox that was attached to a piece of equipment that the oxen are to pull. It's big and bulky and exhausting. Jesus desires to take the heaviness that I'm crushed by, and give me a new yoke to carry. One that is shared with a God whose back is way bigger than mine and can support a lot more of the weight. So today, I'm thankful that, yes I am more fragile than a teacup, but I can't be crushed because the King of the Universe is my support system. I know there will be times when I place too much faith in my own strength and crumble under the weight, but again and again I believe that God is right there to help get me back on my feet and sweetly remind me to walk beside Him. I'm thankful that I am able to put my hope in a God who ISN'T human, in a God who won't break because He is victorious.

Find Your Flame

People are my passion, caring is my gift, loving is my calling. This is why I have set out on the journey to become a nurse. It's kind of hilarious the number of people who comment on the strenuosity (<-- not sure if that's a word but it sounds neat so I'm using it) of the work load when they find out I'm in nursing school. People are always telling me how great of a field nursing is because nurses will ALWAYS be needed and there are a virtually endless amount of job opportunities for those who choose to pursue this career path. However, I'm not in this because of the thrill of the challenge or the confidence in my future job security. I'm not in this because of the desire to feel needed or important. I'm not even in this for the pretty solid chunk of change I could possibly earn if I pursue the career for long enough. I'm in this because I love people. One of my most favorite things about life is the opportunity to show someone else that they are important and that they are cared for and no matter now alone they may possibly feel in this world, someone loves them. There are old folks in nursing homes who have no family, no friends and very limited social interaction - meaning that the few people who they come in contact with are their medical care team. If I have a chance to show that sweet little man or woman that they matter, then I have made a vow to take it. The same goes for any circumstance on a rehab unit, or on the pediatrics floor or in a make-shift medical center in a homeless shelter. Every single person deserves to feel love - regardless of their race, religion, gender, past, present or future. So this is why I want to be a nurse. Because I am a strong believer that each person is born with some kind of passion. I believe that God placed each of us on this earth with purpose in mind and He has given us this amazing adventure called life to discover our passion and run with it. The only qualifications are a willing heart and the courage to step into something greater than we could ever dream of. I serve a mighty King who holds my future in His hands. Even on the worst days when my grades suck and I want to quit school, God's quiet voice reminds me of that passion inside of me. Yes, there are people everywhere who need medical attention and there has to be people willing to learn the skills to give it to them and that's important. But what's more important, at least to me, is that there are people who need to be cared for and loved in a specific way that only a nurse can give. That is why I keep going. That is why I'm in nursing school. That is why I can't wait to fulfill the incredible passion inside me.